Hindu Convert - Sister Noor
I came from a purely Hindu family where we were always taught to regard
ourselves (i.e. women) as beings who were eventually to be married off and
have children and serve the husband - whether he was kind or not. Other than
this I found that there were a lot of things which really oppressed women,
such as:
* If a woman was widowed,
she would always have to wear a white sari (costume), eat vegetarian
meals, cut her hair short, and never re-marry. The bride always had to pay
the dowry (bridal money) to the husband's family. And the husband could
ask for anything, irrespective of whether the bride would have difficulty
giving it.
* Not only that, if after
marriage she was not able to pay the full dowry she would be both
emotionally and physically tortured, and could end up being a victim of "kitchen
death" where the husband, or both the mother-in-law and the
husband try to set fire to the wife while she is cooking or is in the
kitchen, and try to make it look like an accidental death. More and more
of these instances are taking place. The daughter of a friend of my own
father's had the same fate last year!
* In addition to all
this, men in Hinduism are treated literally as among the gods. In one of
the religious Hindu celebrations, unmarried girls pray for and worship an
idol representing a particular god (Shira) so that they may have husbands
like him. Even my own mother had asked me to do this. This made me see
that the Hindu religion which is based on superstitions and things that
have no manifest proof , but were merely traditions which oppressed women
could not be right.
Subsequently, when I came to
England to study, I thought that at least this is a country which gives equal
rights to men and women, and does not oppress them. We all have the freedom to
do as we like, I thought. Well, as I started to meet people and make new
friends, learn about this new society, and go to all the places my friends
went to in order to "socialise" (bars, dance halls, etc.). I
realised that this "equality" was not so true in practice as
it was in theory.
Outwardly, women were seen to
be given equal rights in education, work, and so forth, but in reality women
were still oppressed in a different, more subtle way. When I went with my
friends to those places they hung out at, I found everybody interested to talk
to me and I thought that was normal. But it was only later that I realised how
naïve I was, and recognised what these people were really looking for. I soon
began to feel uncomfortable, as if I was not myself: I had to dress in a
certain way so that people would like me, and had to talk in a certain way to
please them. I soon found that I was feeling more and more uncomfortable, less
and less myself, yet I could not get out. Everybody was saying they were
enjoying themselves, but I don't call this enjoying.
I think women in this way of
life are oppressed; they have to dress in a certain way in order to please and
appear more appealing, and also talk in a certain way so people like them.
During this time I had not thought about Islam, even though I had some Muslim
acquaintances. But I felt I really had to do something, to find something that
I would be happy and secure with, and would feel respected with. Something to
believe in that is the right belief, because everybody has a belief that they
live according to. If having fun by getting off with other people is someone's
belief, they do this. If making money is someone's belief, they do everything
to achieve this. If they believe drinking is one way to enjoy life then they
do it. But I feel all this leads to nowhere; no one is truly satisfied, and
the respect women are looking for is diminishing in this way.
In these days of so called "society
of equal rights", you are expected to have a boyfriend (or you're
weird!) and to not be a virgin. So this is a form of oppression even though
some women do not realise it. When I came to Islam, it was obvious that I had
finally found permanent security. A religion, a belief that was so complete
and clear in every aspect of life. Many people have a misconception that Islam
is an oppressive religion, where women are covered from head to toe, and are
not allowed any freedom or rights. In fact, women in Islam are given more
rights, and have been for the past 1400 years, compared to the only-recently
rights given to non-Muslim women in some western and some other societies. But
there are, even now, societies where women are still oppressed, as I mentioned
earlier in relation to Hindu women.
Muslim women have the right
to inheritance. They have the right to run their own trade and business. They
have the full right to ownership, property, disposal over their wealth to
which the husband has no right. They have the right to education, a right to
refuse marriage as long as this refusal is according to reasonable and
justifiable grounds. The Qur'an itself, which is the Word of God, contains
many verses commanding men to be kind to their wives and stressing the rights
of women. Islam gives the right set of rules, because they are NOT made by
men, but made by God; hence it is a perfect religion.
Quite often Muslim women are
asked why they are covered from head to toe, and are told that this is
oppression - it is not. In Islam, marriage is an important part of life, the
making of the society. Therefore, a woman should not go around showing herself
to everybody, only for her husband. Even the man is not allowed to show
certain parts of his body to none but his wife. In addition, God has commanded
Muslim women to cover themselves for their modesty:
"O Prophet!
Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw
their cloaks (veils) over their bodies (when outdoors). That is most
convenient that they could be known as such (i.e. decent and chaste) and not
molested." (Qur'an 33:59)
If we look around at any
other society, we find that in the majority of cases women are attacked and
molested because of how they are dressed. Another point I'd like to comment on
is that the rules and regulation laid down in Islam by God do not apply just
to women but to men also. There is no intermingling and free-running between
men and women for the benefit of both. Whatever God commands is right,
wholesome, pure and beneficial to mankind; there is no doubt about that. A
verse in the Qur'an explains this concept clearly:
"Say to the believing
men that they should lower their gaze and protect their private parts
(i.e. from indecency, illegal sexual acts, etc.); that will make for greater
purity for them. And God is well aware of what they do. And say to the believing
women that they should lower their gaze and protect their private parts
(from indecency, illegal sexual intercourse, etc.); and that they should not
display their beauty and ornaments . . . " (Qur'an, Surah Al-Nur
24:31)
When I put on my hijab (veil), I was really happy to do it. In fact, I really want to do it. When I
put on the hijab, I felt a great sense of satisfaction and happiness.
Satisfied that I had obeyed God's command. And happy with the good and
blessings that come with it. I have felt secure and protected. In fact people
respect me more for it. I could really see the difference in behaviour towards
me.
Finally, I'd like to say that
I had accepted Islam not blindly, or under any compulsion. In the Qur'an
itself there is a verse which says "Let there be no compulsion in
religion". I accepted Islam with conviction. I have seen, been there,
done that, and seen both sides of the story. I know and have experienced what
the other side is like, and I know that I have done the right thing. Islam
does not oppress women, but rather Islam liberates them and gives them the
respect they deserve. Islam is the religion God has chosen for the whole of
mankind. Those who accept it are truly liberated from the chains and shackles
of mankind whose ruling and legislating necessitates nothing but the
oppression of one group by another and the exploitation and oppression of one
sex by the other. This is not the case of Islam which truly liberated women
and gave them an individuality not given by any other authority.